Burnt Marriage Licenses and Lost Rings

I am starting to get a little worried.  I think the Hubs is trying to leave me.  In the last two years, he has burnt our marriage license and lost his wedding ring.  Pull up a chair and let me explain…

One of the coolest things of living outside of town is that we are allowed to have bonfires on our property.  One fall evening, we decided to have a fire in the backyard after the kids had gone to bed.  The Hubs never was a Boy Scout.  I let him attempt to build the fire, then I stepped in to show him how it was done.  I made the “tee-pee” of sticks and  told him to go get me some paper.

He goes into the garage and comes back with a handful of paper.  I crumble some of it up and place it in the tee-pee and light the fire.

The fire caught and the Hubs took the remaining paper that he had brought out and tossed it on the fire.

As it hit the flames, I noticed it was a big white envelope.  Uhhhh… something didn’t seem right about that.

As it hit the flames, I noticed it was a big white envelope.  Uhhhh…. something didn’t seem right about that.

I reached into the fire and grabbed the envelope and threw it on the ground and stomped on it.

He asked what I was doing and I told him I think this is important.

I picked it up off the ground and held it up to the moonlight so I could see what it was.

There, in my pastor’s handwriting were the words, “Marriage Licenses.”

Uhhhhh….

I asked the Hubs, “What box did you grab this paper from?”

He replied, “The one in the garage that has been sitting there since we moved in.  I think it is stuff that needs shredded.”

I bust out laughing and showed him the envelope and said, “You know, even if you burn the license we are still married, right?”

Fast forward to a few weeks ago…

We woke up on a Monday morning and were jockeying for position in the bathroom.  Finally, the Hubs said, “Have you seen my ring?  I had it on last night and now its gone.”

I immediately went into the bedroom and looked in the bed and behind the headboard, thinking maybe it fell off during the night.

No luck.

We began a massive search… even looking in the laundry shoot in case it slipped off while he was using a towel.

Nope.

Eventually, we both left for work– him without his wedding ring.

Later that morning, the kids called me and Mo said, “Mommy, we found daddy’s ring!”

I asked her where and she said it was in her laundry basket in the dirty clothes.

The sad thing is, I know exactly when it came off his finger… Friday night when we changed the sheets on the twins’ bed.

He went TWO days without knowing it was gone.

And, don’t for a minute think he will ever live these two stories down…

So, in the last two years, the Hubs has tried to burn our marriage license and lost his ring… think I should be worried?